Alright still

Alright still. 

Hello I'm Clo!
 
Lily Allen's first Album was entitled Alright Still. It's all about life and perspective.


So recently I've been having a bit of a tough time. After a sudden family bereavement and the ending of a long term relationship and then the subsequent discovery of adultery on his part, July 2013 wasn't the best month for me, just like they said in the Devil Wears Prada: it's a sign you're doing well at work when your personal life falls apart and turns to short term shit.

My wonderful cousin Adam died suddenly and unexpectedly early July, a great loss to our close knit family unit, telling my grandmother her only grandson had died was by far the hardest thing I've ever had to do and I hope, that day, will remain the worst of my life and that nothing like this occurs ever again.

Adam, Nan and I two years ago.


Just a week later I discover my boyfriend of 6 months had slept with someone else he had just met just hours after I cried in his arms after discovering the devastating news about Adams passing at the tender age of 31. All this after being separated for just 3 days, with a view to time appart and after personal growth a reconciliation.
Any girl who has been cheated on knows exactly how I felt, violated, disgusted and deeply hurt. Despite the fact we had separated, there is no excuse for frivolous, insensitive, disrespectful behavior towards someone you supposedly 'love'.


So July hit hard and I was left with two big craters in my mind. I drew an emotional blank and spent about two weeks crying, shouting and being angry. I found myself crumbling at meetings, unable to cope in large crowds and drinking and going out with friends was not the answer, so I stopped completely.

At this time I found myself listening to a lot of Taylor Swift and early Maroon 5 albums to sooth my soul and to stop me hitting the 'tweet' button with my foul mouth rants about people's morals and shocking attitudes.

When bad things happen its often very difficult to talk about it with anybody no matter who they are or how close they are to you. I am very fortunate as I have my very own angel in disguise, my close friend L who is always on hand when there is a problem or crisis!
She was there when I needed a hug, needed to shout and cry down the phone. My girlfriends have been by my side ready to jump into action and my guy friends were there to offer the necessary jibe, comment of support as well as the odd joke to brighten the situation and help me out when I was down.
It's only now that I've come through the angry, hurt, cry-a-lot stage that I realise that you can't control other people's actions and like my friend L says;

'"This has happened, there is no way of turning back time, how do I move on from this?"


No matter how down you are, there is always someone out there to talk to, if you dot feel you can speak to a friend or family member there are always helplines, it sounds very forced 'helplines ' but its always an option if you just want to rant to someone who won't judge or pass comment.

Because of this turmoil I've sort solitude in boots half price offers as compensation, most notably palmers cocoa butter. ( I just can't get enough!!) and subsequently will be occupied for the next few weeks reviewing and doing hauls and what not on my YouTube and Blogger channel! (It's all very exciting stuff!)

So as things return to normal I've figure I'll be alright , all things are meant to happen for a reason and after the storm has passed and blown over I'll be alright still.

That's all for today,

Toodle Pip, Chin up everyone. The only way is up.

Clo :-)


No comments:

Leave a comment