50 Things I Learnt From My Ex

Hello I'm Clo!

Todays post is a little different, if it were a song it'd be chompy, stompy a little bit angry, passionate yet composed. It's a reflective post about the things i will take from my last relationship, It's aim was to be positive, however there are a fair few jibes in there. I hope you find this helpfull or funny! Either or!

 The song I've chosen to acompany this post ironically is "I Knew You Were Trouble" - Taylor Swift.


 Just over a month ago, my [Then] boyfriend and I parted. I was then to discover by reading something on someone elses phone that he'd slept with someone who at 20 has 4 children and has also slept with over 80 women (Go Figure) this happened just hours after I cried in his arms after discovering the news of my cousins sudden death at the age of 31. He denied it, we reconciled, I found out he lied and things got ugly.

So- thinking the other night as i was cleaning my room about the things i need to take from the relationship  i compiled a list. Here. We. Go.


1. Guys are bad at Monopoly.
2. Guys are bad losers. It's their nature.
3. Girlfriends and pals perhaps sometimes know too much about a situation.
4. We are all, deep down, close to our mums in some way, shape or form.
5. Guy friends (That are straight) are imperative, essential, gotta be done. You need them.
6. When the shit hits the fan you really need phone credit. - as no one pre-books shit hitting the fan.
7. Shouting along to Taylor Swift tunes helps. Fan girl or not.
8. Never change who you are to suit someone else.
9. You need a girl who's got your back, not a knife.
10. There are good girls and bad girls
11.Stand your ground take no shit.
12. Thinking and re-thing is totes normal.
13. Love is hard.
14. The friend with the most issues, usually gives the best advice.
15. Shopping will never ever help, or cure a broken heart.
16. You will never be able to erase the time you spent together - so why try?
17. Don't hide away.
18. Voice your side of the story.
19. People talk, you'll never stop them.
20. Blood is thicker than water.
21. Pets, know the feels.
22. 'Friends' take sides.
23. Karma is one mighty bitch.
24. Seeking a replacement is a straight up no-no.
25. Everyone is a liar.
26. Honesty is the best policy.
27. Words once spoken can not be taken back.
28. This break-up is not the be all and end all of life as you know it.
29. Get yourself tested. Especially if they've done the dirty.
30. Have no shame.
31. There is nothing you could have possibly done to stop this.
32. Religion is not the way forward.
33. Do not burn or deface their belongings.
34. Just give them back their bloody Skins box set. It'll save ALOT of hassle.
35. You can't tarr everyone with the same brush.
36. Have 'Me Time' if you need to get away to be somewhere quiet. Go and be somewhere quiet.
37. Do not take a leap of faith.
38. Leave the Ben and Jerry's alone. Put it down. Now. Hey! I've told you!
39. See point 38.
40. There are plenty more fish in the sea.
41. Learn to hold some things back, next time around, don't give everything.
42. Guys find it near impossible to admit they're wrong.
43. Do not wink/ lingerie/ naked snapchat/ innuendo or otherwise. They lost that privilege and are now an ex for a reason.
44. You are brill. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
45. Do not be afraid to be on your own.
46. Breath, breathing is good.
47. Dirty dance in your bedroom naked. Let it all out. Bang on the tunes.
48. Do your ironing.
49. Do not call him.
50. Life goes on! No one is worth your tears!

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